Episodes
Ep. 140 | UBP ESP: Our Red and Blue Album Reissue Predictions
Ice-T asked the question with which many Beatles fans wrestle on his 1988 hit, “Colors”: Red or Blue?
Both double albums are amazing chronicles of the Beatles’ chart hits and key album tracks. But they were assembled 50 years ago, and for their anniversary year, it’s been rumored that both LP’s will be reissued, remixed, and expanded! How do we know for sure? Well, it’s like Ice-T said in his 1988 hit, “Colors” - in arguably the most savage diss in rap history: “You don’t know me, foooooool! You disown me? Cool”! #SavageAF
This week, Tony & T.J. use the power of ESP to wildly speculate what essential Fab cuts will be added to each album. With music’s 2nd greatest catalog from which to choose (#1 is Korn, obvi), would the Red & Blue Two make similar adds? There’s only one way to find out! Send a check or money order to P3Z-Nutz! Or you could listen, I guess…because we also consider:
🍟 If The Beatles were McDonalds, would Allen Klein and Dave Dexter be the Fry Guys?
🍩 (Angry Chicago Guy:) HOW COME TONY CANCELLED DONUTS?
🐴👺 If Horst Fascher changed his name to Horse Fascist, would he be Florida's governor?
EPISODE LINKS
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Ep. 138 | The Beatles LOVE by Cirque du Soleil - A Very Special Untitled Beatles Field Trip
What happens in Vegas… sometimes gets leaked back to your partner in your podcast feed. This week, T.J. and Tony PRODUCER CASEY trek out to the desert to take in a Wednesday evening performance of The Beatles LOVE by Cirque du Soleil. Tony and P3Z-Nutz get left behind in the studio, but may just get the last laugh, as the Drab Dos give their reviews of the show and hit on such timeless topics as:
🥩 What’s Gordon Ramsey got against Tony, and what gives with all the GI issues? (Or would they be Doughboy issues? #callback)
👮 What’s a guy gotta do to get kicked out of the Mirage gift shop?
🤡 <angry Chicago guy> How come those fancy French clowns replaced the Old Style with 20-dollar craft brews, and I Am The Walrus with some Matchbox Twenty bullhooey?
And is it just us, or is P3Z sounding more and more like George Martin? #beatlesconspiracies
EPISODE LINKS
HEY COME AND MEET US AT THE FEST FOR BEATLES FANS IN CHICAGO AUGUST 11-13
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Ep. 137 | The Beatles Songs… That Aren’t
Even the most casual Beatles fan knows that Beatles songs are Beatles songs. But did you know that *some* Beatles songs *aren't* *Beatles* songs? #RuleOfSixAsteriks
"Follow me?" Or is that merely an obscure Lerner & Loewe song cut from Aaron Sorkin's "Camelot"? Look, here's the deal: Tony and T.J. thought it'd be a literal butt-gas to explore the wild world of "Beatles Songs That Aren't: The Song Titles The Beatles Gave Away." Now on Pair records and (gentlemen, we got the) Tapes.
On their Journey, when the lights go down in the cit-ay, they also ponderosa:
🦚 Which White Album cut doubled as the theme to a late 60's NBC sitcom? (Hint: it's the Bea Arthur vehicle "Sexy Sadie".)
🍺 Chicago over everything means Richard Marx > everything, yes? Including The Beatles? Yup, Chicago All-Starr Richard Marx > The Beatles. Done. #312 #NoLongerBrewedHere #Cowards
🥪 Does ELO listen to Wilco's ELT while eating a BLT, doing PCP on the CTA and listening to the UBP, now mornings on select NPR HD2 affiliates?
EPISODE LINKS
HEY COME AND MEET US AT THE FEST FOR BEATLES FANS IN CHICAGO AUGUST 11-13
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Ep. 136 | The Beatles’ (Fantasy) Summer LP
Rumour has it, if you mash up The Beach Boys' "Endless Summer" compilation with the Grease showstopper "Summer Nights", you get 137th Beatle Richard Marx's classic cassingle, "Endless Summer Nights" (🚫) "Right Here Waiting" (🛎).
But…what if you get crazy and accidentally add John & Yoko's "Double Fantasy"? MAYBE NOBODY KNOWS? (#MccartneyII #McCartneyEyeEye)
Good thing Tony and TJ, 98.9's Hot FM midday summer jamz expertz, know about Summer, The Beatles, and fantasies, dear mister! And the #TanTwo have generously assembled their own fantasy summer Beatles compilations to cure your summertime blues! So don't raise a fuss and don't raise a holler, Wisk helps get rid of ring around the collar! And:
🦭 Do Arctic-adjacent kids who love art projects listen to a lot of Seals and Crafts? And was that really worth it?
🪖 So, turns out Tony's a WW-Eye expert, huh?
🍦 If Mike Love was flavor of ice cream, would he still be a d**k?
EPISODE LINKS
HEY COME AND MEET US AT THE FEST FOR BEATLES FANS IN CHICAGO AUGUST 11-13
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Ep. 135 | The Beatles as Sidemen
If there’s one thing we know about our beloved Fabs, it’s that they all liked to get a little on the side. Know what we’re sayin’, guy/lady/however you identify, any of which is cool with us? Well get yer minds out of the gutter! Because in this episode we take a look at some of our very favorite moments with The Beatles as Sidemen, and their notable appearances on other people’s records. Some collabs (hawt pic, DM us!) make perfect sense, while some are completely random and hilarious. And, If you’re Basketball Howard Jonesin’ for more, don’t try to live your life in one day! We do find the time to wonder:
🐹 Hey HamHeads, match each Schuyler Sister (Eliza, Angelica, and Peggy) with a UBP mainstay (P3Z-Nutz, Dave Dexter, Jimmie Nicol). Bonus points for being in the greatest city in the world: SHEBOYGAN, BABY! #WerkWerk
🇺🇸💳 Is it true that in the 1990’s, you weren’t legally allowed to be in a room with Macca if you used an American Express? (Angry Chicago Guy: AND HOW COME DINERS CLUB DON’T SPONSOR NO BANGLADESH?)
🏖Can you really call yourself a Beatles fan if you don’t know what record label Belinda/Brandi Carlisle was/is on? And does that explain the delay in Lewishon’s “Tune In Vol 2: Heaven Is A Place On Earth”?
#Untitled #Beatles #Podcast
EPISODE LINKS
HEY COME AND MEET US AT THE FEST FOR BEATLES FANS IN CHICAGO AUGUST 11-13
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Ep. 131 | The Beatles Sell Out: The Fab Four in Ads
What makes a "sell out"? Did you sell out? Did Who? How 'bout when? Or sometimes, y? #sometimesand #provtalk
And what about AI? Does it scare you? Is it weird to be scared of a 76'er who retired years ago and hated - I mean, HATED - practice? Not the game! He's talking about practice.
Today's episode considers both related topics. Do commercials with covers or (ahem, sloppily edited) original Beatles music brand our beloved Fabs as sell outs? And what of Beatles AI: awful, or artful?
Along this Journey (#OpenArms), our own cell outs (#AmeritechBell) consider:
🥩 Does everybody know your name at Chili's, Applebees, or Rudy Tuesjays?
🇺🇸 John Lewis remains a beloved, American civil rights hero. Was he also a UK department store?
🐴🪦 Is Golden Slumbers best heard as a cover in a TV commercial with the sounds of a large, apparently quite ill animal snoring and I think farting?
EPISODE LINKS:
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Ep. 130 | A Trivial Beatles Podcast - Game 1, Part 2
Arguably, the most famous sitcom episode of the 1990’s was from the syndicated-only “New WKRP In Cincinnati”, where station manager Arthur “Big Guy” Carlson challenges rival station WPIG to an on-air poker match. Two problems: 1) poker on the radio? WHUT. And 2) Despite the generational hilarity of its predecessor, “The New WKRP” su-su-su-su-SUCKED! What were you thinking, Bill Dial?
But you know what doesn’t suck? The Beatles! And especially non-sucking is The Beatles Trivial Pursuit special edition! This week, Tony & T.J. square off and conclude their inaugural game. No spoilers, but a last-minute rule change fixed the result worse than the only actual rigged election in recent memory, the one the Supreme Court handed to GW Bush that began the downfall of America! BUT WE DIGRESS!!!
So girl, get your game play on, and join us as we also ask:
🥧 What’s the best Prince song: “Purple Pie”, “When Doves Pie”, “The Ballad Of Dorthy Pie-ker”, “Raspberry Pie-ret”, or “Sexy Mother F🥧🥧ker (Pie Remix)?” #RuleOfFives
⚾️ (Read as angry, vaguely drunk White Sox fan): How come Bruce Spizer don’t write no books about CBS’ critically adored, little watched, New Orleans-focused dramedy from 1987, “Frank’s Place”? And how come Spizer hates Tim Reid AND Tim Anderson?
📻 Is Radiohead’s “Kid A” the equivalent of “Abbey Road”, for people who don’t care about minor details like “memorable songs”?
EPISODE LINKS:
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Ep. 129 | The Beatles’ (Fantasy) Country LP
Tony & T.J. aren’t just Beatles fans. Nah, son. Look at them arms. They country strong. LOOK AT THEM ARMS! G’ON, LOOK! NOW TOUCH THEM ARMS. TOUCH THEM. NOW SQUEAL LIKE A PIG…
And, like The Beatles, we at the UBP have a deep appreciation for classic Country music. (Western, however can go f**k itself. Got that, “Paint Your Wagon” soundtrack? #DrunkLeeMarvin)
Based on a great episode suggestion from perhaps our youngest listener, Owen (#ThanksO), this week Tony & T.J. assemble their fantasy takes on a Beatles Country album. And while they boot scoot boogie their way thru many Fab country tunes, they also ponder:
⚾️ Was Enrico Pallazzo on the legendary, literally-everybody's-heard-of-it, #FantasyRecords?
😭 CLASSIC PARTY GAME ALERT! Let’s play “Pair someone from Tears For Fears with one of the Three Stooges!”
🍆 Did anyone else watch “Skiffle After Dark” on Skinemax back in 1989? #LonnieDongagain
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Ep. 127 | A Trivial Beatles Podcast
Trivia! What a silly word. I mean, how many words rhyme with “Jergens?” Feel me, Jacque?
Sadly, ever since Alex Trebek pulled a (rather cowardly) #HeGone, the pursuit of trivia - Beatles and otherwise - has been largely dormant in America. But not this week! Because Tony and T.J. each break out their deluxe editions of Beatles Trivial Pursuit and play a heated, often deadly round or three of the game! But don’t you D.A.R.E. think we put the board in “bored game”! Because, madness (#OurHouse) ensues as we also trivially pursue:
🚕 Would NBC have ever considered green-lighting “Dear John” if not for its’ one, ill-fated season of “Taxi”?
⚾️ Were the 90’s Yankees really better without ding-dong-dinger machine Donnie Baseball? (Drunk old Chicago White Sox fan: “What about Bronny Dosco?”)
🚥 Is “Steve Winwood: The Musical” the new “Blind Faith: The Musical”? And will you miss both if you’re stuck in traffic? Shit that’s a lot of Steve Winwood references, right? Too many? Or just about right, in a “rule of 3’s” way? We ask rhetorically, like don’t send us notes or anything like that, because we won’t read it. Who’s got the time? Like, how do YOU even have the time to write a Beatles podcast about a failed Steve Winwood bit? Think about that next time you find yourself drinking a High Life again. Drinking a high…life…again.
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Ep. 124b | Sixth Beatle Bracket Part 2
OK, OK, we got all our April foolishness out of our systems… now back to the VERY SERIOUS BUSINESS at hand. This week T.J., Tony, and Casey pick up right where they left off in their pursuit to crown the undisputed SIXTH BEATLE.
Join as we narrow the field down from our Sweet XVI, see whether any Cinderella stories stretch through the Final IV, and find out:
🍳 What’s Tony’s deal with Mel from Mel’s Diner?
👖 What’s Brian Epstein’s deal with trousers?
🤖🍑 What’s T.J.’s deal with robutts?
To almost quote the great Chicago Bulls play-by-play announcer Chuck Swirsky: This hotly anticipated finale is (glass) ONIONS BABY, ONIONS.
EPISODE LINKS:
Download your bracket to play along at home
Check out Giles Martin and Rick Rubin on Broken Record (Part 1, Part 2)
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